The baby shower was today. It was fun. Only 12 people showed up, but I had fun. Also got a lot of loots.
Even walking away with all that stuff, I feel overwhelmed. I kind of thought that Curtis’s parents might get us a crib and since they didn’t, we have to buy one. That’s friggin’ expensive. And we got a lot of clothes, but how do I know if we have enough? And a lot of people got us not newborn clothes, so what if we don’t have enough? We walked away with a ton of quilts. In the future, I swear not to give people quilts for baby showers. It really makes no sense–the baby can’t even use a quilt until they’re older. I can put the quilt on the floor and put her on it. Also cover her with it when we’re outside. She wont sleep with it though. So why do we have ten of them?
So I need to wash all the clothes in the baby soap. Also all the damn quilts. Do I need to wash stuffed animals? What about toys? Do I need to do anything to them? Who knows where they’ve been? Where am I going to get money to buy things? I feel like my brain is going to explode.
So I’m fat, hurting, uncomfortable, awkward, moody–and I want to stay this way. Just because that means the baby stays in there. I’m so freaked out about having to care for this child. And This Damned Crib Business! Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!