Friendship Terminated

I found out the other day that a girl who I went to high school with deleted me from her friends on Facebook. This wasn’t just any girl from high school though. She was in my prom group (there were only 3 couples, so kind of a big deal), she came to my wedding, she was one of 3 of my friends who came to my baby shower. She is LDS, but I had her categorized as one of the good ones that doesn’t judge me or hate me for not being religious. Reasonably, I felt hurt.

I assumed there was some mistake, so I texted her. She admitted to it and said “It was selfish on my part and I stand by it.”

I Twitter. I’ve been Tweeting for some time and it has always updated my Facebook status. As of the last few months, I’ve been using Twitter to it’s full extent and following things that I’m interested in. Along with my friends, I follow CNN, Al Gore, various mommybloggers, and–most important for the sake of this story–many breastfeeding activists. I quite often retweet things the people that I follow say. It’s mostly links to articles, but I retweet them because I have people who follow me and I have friends on facebook who want to read these articles.

Apparently, I offended her? She says “I could live without constant detail of your breasts and their milk and your use of profanities.” This is the breakdown of my tweets for the last 6 days before this discussion: 38 tweets total (that would be posted to Facebook… so no @replys), 7 were about breastfeeding, 4 had profanity. Of the 7 that were about breastfeeding, 5 were retweets and 2 were actually referring to me breastfeeding. The profanity is something that I find reasonable to be offended about–even if I don’t agree with it. But breastfeeding? Breastfeeding is offending you? Oh my. This is bad.

I will admit that one of the two tweets was about me using breastmilk to cure Peanut’s eye infection…

…(it worked), but it’s still not horribly offensive imo. She called what I was saying “irreverent and disgusting” which is something I just can’t understand.

Though I wish I could change everyone’s opinion on breastfeeding, it is simply not possible. So instead, I will say that if you find what I say or do offensive or disrespectful and you’re not willing to deal with it, I’m not willing to deal with you.

“Be who you are and say what you feel because people who mind don’t matter and people who matter don’t mind.” Dr. Suess


6 thoughts on “Friendship Terminated

  1. I am sorry she got offened, but like the quote said, those that matter don't mind and those that mind don't matter. ๐Ÿ™‚ Keep doing what you love. ๐Ÿ™‚

  2. That is ridiculous Claire! I love how you are so dedicated to breastfeeding, that is something I really wish I had tried harder at. Keep doing what you're doing because you're giving support to many moms, even me, to stand up and say "there is nothing disgusting with breastfeeding"! I admire your dedication!

  3. Claire that is riduculous! I admire you for your dedication to breastfeeding, you make me wish I had tried harder and you will be my person to turn to when I want to give up with my next baby. Keep doing what you're doing, I love reading your posts no matter what they are about!

  4. I'm sorry you lost a friend over something that you are so pasionate about. I think it's great you are willing to stand up for something like that. Some people especially those who are not mom's just don't understand.

  5. Thank you for linking to this! I just started reading your blog and haven’t made it back this far yet. I hate that you went through this too, but I feel SO much better (seriously SOOOO much) that someone else is in the same boat. My sister-in-law told me that I sound like a fanatic. Of course I sound like a fanatic. It’s something that I am passionate about, so I’m going to talk about it, and probably often.

    I compared my frequent status updates about breastfeeding to my previously frequent status updates about being pregnant. It is a HUGE part of my life and a great amount of time that I spend on the computer coincides with the amount of time spent with a child on my boob. People post ALL THE TIME about how they’re hungry, how they’re making this for dinner, how they’re going to Taco Bell, how they’re eating this, how good dessert was… etc etc etc… You don’t see me going around telling them that they sound like fanatics, do you?

    Sheesh. I’m still just so upset over the whole ordeal. I’m sorry, again, that you had to go through this too.

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