On Being A Stay At Home Mom

It is incredibly frustrating to me that people think that by staying at home with my child that I am taking the easy way out. Or that I obviously sit on the couch all day eating bonbons. Or that I have all the time in the world why isn’t my house clean or why aren’t I curing world hunger or at least doing something useful?!?

To that, I would like to say, I am sustaining a life. No one can truly understand how trying it is to be a stay at home mom until they are one. People like to think of it as being unemployed. I think of it as one of the most difficult jobs I’ve ever had. You don’t get breaks, you work literally 24-7, no vacations, no real money, and I. Can’t. Quit. I never sleep for more than 4 hours straight and the lack of adult conversation by itself is maddening.

I have zero time because I have one of those babies that wants constant attention and to be held. Then when she is on her playmat or taking a nap, I’m too exhausted to do anything. But wait, I do have to do things. My messy house still needs to be taken care of, oh my god I have so much laundry, not to mention the homework that I should really be doing right now as I type this. And guess what? When I do have that small moment to myself where I can get on a real computer (I swear I’d go insane without my iPhone) I don’t want to spend it doing something for you.

This isn’t the only situation that I’ve felt this way. There are small things from the kid in class saying I’m “just a stay at home mom” or all of the women tell me how lucky I am to not have to go to a job and then come home and mother. Try mothering constantly (and I mean fricking CONSTANTLY), I bet it’s harder than any of your jobs. Even my husband–during my pregnancy–didn’t like the idea of me staying at home with Peanut. After spending time alone with her, he said “I understand why you don’t get on WoW anymore.”

So to all of you who think that being a stay at home mom is fun or easy, you are so WRONG. It is the most difficult thing I’ve done in my life. They say labor is difficult, but that’s just the beginning.

So don’t you dare tell me I obviously have 5 minutes to take to do something. How can someone not have 5 minutes?

This is not at all saying that I would chose to be anything but a stay at home mom or that I’m regretful for having Peanut. I love her dearly and wouldn’t take away a single moment I have with her.


4 thoughts on “On Being A Stay At Home Mom

  1. I dont know how many times I've told my wife she has the most difficult job in the world. Not only is she a stay at home mum, but she also has her own side business along with nannying other people's kids. Not only that, but defending against everyone that thinks its the easiest thing in the world, or who think my wife should be working a full time job on top of all that – Its just insane. I've lost count of the amount of people i've told off on that.

    So you, lady, you keep on keepin on and tell the naysayers to feth themselves.

  2. Kudos Claire. Don't let those that devalue your important job get you down. There's no job more crucial than taking care of another human being.

  3. Been there and after being a stay at home Mom for 10 years, it’s tough to re-enter the workforce. I wouldn’t have changed a thing because I was there for all the firsts and moments I would have missed and my children know they can always count on Mommy. 🙂
    I’ll even admit, I miss those baby days!!!! I loved breastfeeding, baby attached to me almost all the time, sore nipples and all. Keep on keepin’ on sista!

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